We want you HERE now.

2018 Holly was so very far from being me.

Last night a little Moroccan woman sat on my butt and pummeled me to kingdom come. I’m kinda surprised my spine is still intact.

You know that feeling when you’re in a place and you have zero idea why?

That keeps happening for me. Opportunities to travel places, and my body says yes before I have any chance of mentally processing if I should go.

I just landed in Marrakech, and in a few hours, I’m going fully off grid into the desert.

My friend April is hosting a retreat, and like Ireland a few weeks ago, and Mexico in February. I actually had no idea what I was signing up for, but my body just said yes. My soul said yes.

Taylor asks me what the hell is going on with the astrology right now. It’s mental. Yes it is. It feels like everything is moving SO fast, and the by-product is that it feels like I’m being shuttled around wherever the Universe wants me, without two seconds thought as to where I’m actually going.

Oh. We want you HERE now.

And HERE now….. Then HERE now.

And all of this is just forcing me into deeper and deeper presence. To show up to what is here, without trying to fight it, and let it work through me.

I literally feel like I’m in the semi-final of some life tournament I’ve been prepping for for a decade.

And HERE NOW »»

That fractional deal that was in flux, finally closed. And yes the numbers don’t really mean too much, but what I learnt in the process was what my ACTUAL value proposition was to clients. Because this client spelled it out for me.

The old recruiting model of charging an upfront fee of like $20k - $40k, for someone that might leave in 6 months, doesn’t ACTUALLY make sense for the business.

Because you know what? PEOPLE ARE FALLIBLE. AND PEOPLE CHANGE THEIR MINDS.

And moreover, LIFE happens. Things change.

So a marginal set up on talent that is basically pay as you go. EVERYBODY WINS.

Because trust takes time. For a client to hire somebody into their business, AND for the person to know if the business is right for them….

Trust takes time. And that’s what this fractional business is being built on.

And HERE NOW »»

That content that it literally feels like I’ve been editing for a decade, well I finally pushed play on it.

And I got my website and Linkedin to a place that feels REALLY sexy to me. (yes you can tell me how sexy they are).

And I am well aware of how fucking lame it is to feel stoked about content and my LinkedIn page… but what it means to me is the foundation of a structure that has literally been years in the making.

Years to create a Linkedin and website?

Lol. No. Years to feel SO clear on what I’m building, and to have the structure and revenue systems in place to actually scale.

This journey has literally taken me years, and I’m not ashamed to admit that. Even though there is a voice in the back of my head saying you “should” be somewhere different by now.

I now have a system which is scalable. And everything is about visibility, and I have outreach and content being pushed out whilst I’m out here talking to god in the Agafay desert.

That turns me on big time.

A structure that allows me to own my time. But still participate and take action in it’s growth without exhausting myself of all creative energy.

And HERE NOW »»

I’ve been staying with my parents for the last 10 days. And there are so many gifts and so many lessons in this. And trying to articulate the whole thing of what I’ve been building to my Dad is a challenge to say the least.

Because what he represents is the old world. One job for life and financial stability and security and you need to give EVERYTHING to your job.

And that way of living killed me.

The entirety of my spiritual practice right now is in this relationship with him. With money and him and god.

And again, I’m in the semi-final of a match I’ve been preparing for for a decade.

Holding this vision and this direction, without making him wrong. Without putting up barriers. Understanding that his concerns are the way he loves me.

I really do need to get a job. Because numbers are looking minimal right now. Yes, even though there is growth and scalability, but MAN the idea of some sort of guaranteed income every month feels HELLA good.

And the old me would have been hustling and applying to everything in a mad panic.

But this version says OK, there is something I need to pay attention to right now. What is it?

So I don’t hustle, and I don’t force, and I get quiet. And then 2 people who are building businesses in a very similar space drop in. You need to reach out Hol.

I don’t want to. I’m scared. Because they are people I really admire in what they are building, and I can see how it could align so VERY neatly with Whole Collective in some partnerships capacity.

And now that I know what I want, I don’t want to take the action. Because what if I get rejected? What if what if….

So I pause. Get quiet. Recenter. I know what I need to do next, but it’s my job to be centered as I do it.

And so I arrive in Marrakech last night. And sat on the rooftop of this riad at sunset, hundreds of birds flying overhead, the wind is hot and dry, an escape from the humid UK heatwave.

Breathe.

I send the emails. It’s easy. One of them replied this morning.

THIS IS THE WHOLE GAME.

It’s not the 10,000 hustle actions. But the next indicated action. Again and again and again. And to find centeredness before taking that action.

And HERE NOW »»

There are so many places to be. Everything. Everywhere. All at once. Everything feels like it’s speeding up.

How can that all just be ok?

Some days I feel like a total maniac. Some days I feel like total magic.

It’s ALL of it. ALL at once. I feel ALL of it.

It’s been a minute since I’ve been able to go fully off grid. Without the option of dropping into some emails if I wanted to. Like, I’ve always been able to find cell service.

I’m not nervous. I’m in relief. I haven’t been alone in 3 ½ weeks. Which for me is a lot. And it’s all perfect. Of course it is. But the desert knows how to strip me bare.

I have the foundation of a structure set up. But now it’s time to go strip myself bare, and drop into raw creationism. Where the wind is calling my name. Reminding me of who I really am. No-one and everyone.

I tried writing this Substack on the plane yesterday. But I found myself trying to craft all these points about polarity and opposition in business, and yeah sometimes I love that shit. And yeah I’m seeing how people are making shit loads of money off their writing and this platform, and maybe there’s a better way to structure this all.

Maybe.

But goddam it I love to write. This personal blog is my own catharsis. Reminding myself that I am messy and a maniac and magic all at the same time.

That there are so many ups and downs and sideways and betweens and I have no idea what I’m doing or how I even got here. But all of that is ok. And it’s ok to be witnessed in it.

Thank you 1,000 subscribers for being the masculine witness to all my feminine holy mess.

And then The Kinn in Venice asked me to host a writing container. Which will be starting July 28. Details to follow. So maybe it’s ok to be a holy mess after all.

And HERE NOW »»

Last point. I can’t promise.

I spent a good amount of time at the entry border to Morocco yesterday, because passport control didn’t believe the picture on my passport was really me.

I took that as the biggest compliment as I was smiling.

2018 Holly was so far from being me. But she made it after all.

And HERE NOW »»

Adios.

I love you.

—Holly Gottlieb (Founder, Whole Collective)

---

Whole Collective help values-driven founders grow their businesses. But we’re building this thing differently: hiring models X nervous system tools X people-centered AI.

If you're a founder or business leader who wants to explore what building from a regulated nervous system actually looks like in practice, reply to this email

Sign up to be part of our fractional network at bottom of this page: https://www.wholecollective.net/